The Midnight Thought

“We all have our lives tainted in some way, some are in a happening way and some in a sad way. But in that torn life we always need a hand, a hand that always makes us feel connected, make us feel not alone, sometimes like a kid who always wants his mother to be around him, like an addiction. We all want to feel secured, in a way, Owned. Life never stops giving you surprises. Always there is something which keeps bothering you at nights, like your disease, grades, when  your partner doesn’t reply or pick up the call or when your father is not happy from your actions the previous day even when you did the right thing, or your professional work at office or some other conference issues, there is always something which bothers you. There is no way to escape those because they are the realities, Realities which your life runs on, as consequences of your actions only. You either live with them facing them or choose to ignore them, totally your choice but either way they’ll keep coming back to bother you because they need to be done with. They sometimes make you miserable, you hate humanity, you think that people don’t change, you don’t admit you are alone, you don’t admit that someday you can be broken because you think you’re already broken and damaged. But that’s not where it ends, it kills you to death until you accept that you are weaker than them and they control you but they don’t. They don’t if you face them, then they clash with you, break you and create something out of you which is good.

In all this happiness, sadness, bothering, dealing, coming in & out, facing, melancholy, epiphany and creation, you learn that you can’t do everything alone. That hand you needed and hold, was there. You might have missed it or didn’t feel it, however it was there, always! The hand might be of someone your own age, a kid, an old person or your soulmate. but it does make you feel like that there is a higher power that works with you, always! Always making you feel like you are connected to something which was existing before you and will exist after you. That power works with everyone, every goddamn time, every goddamn day and in every goddamn situation but it can never without you. It always needs you just like you need it. You might not feel it every time, but you'll do, someday you'll do! But when????”

And this thought kept me awake half the night..!